Long Week

It's been a long week, and I have a much longer one ahead of me. I have a presentation in class on Wednesday, the materials for which I need to turn in to my prof tomorrow so she can go over them with me. (I haven't really started on all that yet.) Turns out another prof will be visiting our class that day. yay. Extra pressure. Whatever I come up with for my presentation will end up being time wasted though, since I know my prof will completely change the direction of all of it and I'll have to redo it all. (that's what she did for my earlier presentation, and what she's done for most everyone else in the class.) I also have a giant timeline due on Wednesday for which I've been gathering information most of this week and all weekend. Thursday I have a quiz in Psych, and Friday I have a big paper due for Symphonic Lit. Next week on Tuesday the rough draft for my final paper in Psych is due.... so I will have to work on that this week as well. Oy.

I'm feeling rather burnt out. I have actually been spending a lot of time this week studying and doing my homework, which is good. But the problem is that when I stay up really late working on things, especially score study to prepare for class and such, I just don't sleep well when I go to bed. I tend to have strange dreams anyway, but they seem to be getting more and more restless over the past year or so. Sometimes when the weather is nice, or if I just really need it, I'll go outside and walk around or just sit for a while. Across the way from the set of duplexes I live in is this little athletic park/trail place. I love that little area. I can't tell you how many evenings in the past couple weeks I have gone and just sat on the little slope leading into whatever field that is (field hockey maybe?), or gone and walked through the labyrinth. Actually, I've been spending a lot of time outside. I've been replacing my facebook time with being outside and actually studying more. I don't think a day has gone by in a while that I haven't spent at least half an hour just sitting by the mushroom fountain or somewhere in the athletic park. It's just so much easier to think and pray outside. I've been doing a whole lot of that lately, but I still haven't found the answers I'm looking for.

Remember that puzzle I mentioned earlier? It's hard to say sometimes (and now is one of those times), but I think I've been finding several pieces lately. (Actually, it's probably more like they've been laid out for me to find.) Sometimes I'm just not sure if what I'm finding is a piece or not, and I still don't have a clear idea of how to fit them all together. I will keep working on it all, though I may feel like despairing now and then. It's just so hard to deny oneself, and pick up that cross which must be borne daily.